July 19, 2006

The "Axis of Righteousness"

One imagines this piece from the Globe's Giggles Taber...

Israeli Prime Minister Olmert spoke July 17 to the Israeli Knesset of "the Axis of Evil which stretches from Tehran to Damascus." But what of the Ottawa/Washington axis, Ottawa insiders are asking?

Israeli attacks on Lebanon are killing hundreds. Some 40,000 Canadian citizens are at grave risk from these murderous attacks on the innocent. This is what Prime Minister Harper said:

There are "several things that have to take place to bring about a ceasefire and for the ability to keep peace. And we are not very close to that possibility at the moment," said Harper.

At the same time Washington was saying:

Taking a cue from Israel, the administration is distancing itself from allies‘ calls for a cease-fire.

Many insiders now say that Canada, under "Steve", is no longer one of the allies; we are, by grace of the prime minister, joined hip and thigh as partner in the axis of righteousness. And all the while some 40,000 innocent Canadians face slaughter from Israeli fire. Our government's response? Hire civilian cruise ships. Observers are asking why we do not send in the Navy and our Air Force's helicopters.

Jack Layton of the NDP has another take:

I call on the Prime Minister to answer the call of leadership by

* First, calling for an immediate ceasefire.
* Second, by offering a Canadian Forces contingent to join the UN peace keeping force called for by Secretary General Kofi Annan [memo to Jack--there's already one there].
* Third, by developing and executing a plan to provide humanitarian relief to the innocent civilians whose lives have been devastated by this conflict.

Mr. Harper has said today in Paris that it’s too early to send an international force to the region. I say to you, Mr. Harper, it’s never too early to demonstrate the resolve of the Canadian people to bring peace and stability to those who are suffering.

With the destruction of roads, bridges and airports, a land, sea and air blockade, as well as the damaging of vital infrastructure such as water and power grids the people of Lebanon face a coming humanitarian crisis.

Canadian Forces personnel can and must play a role in bringing humanitarian relief to those who are suffering.

Insiders are saying: Send in the Canadian Forces. Walk up to Hezbullah. Stare them straight in the eye. Say to them: "I am Canadian". Then say: "enough". Then phone Jack.

Insiders also say: If the line is busy, try interim Liberal leader Bill Graham for an assertion of the importance of nuanced credibility, a core Canadian value.

Hot: Jack.

Not hot: Steve.

Tepid: Bill.

Mark "Cannonball" C.

Damian adds: God help me, I actually thought this was a real Globe and Mail column.

Posted by markc at July 19, 2006 05:19 PM
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